Sunday Times (Johannesburg) - October 8, 2006

While I was out of the country, I had learned that he had contracted TB and been admitted to hospital for several months. During this time his wife was expecting their second child. Our mother was the breadwinner.

I learned that after the birth of their second child, my brother was allowed to spend some time at home. He enjoyed the company of our family for about two weeks and then had to return to hospital. Two months later he was discharged.

He went to work for his former employer and returned to playing soccer, to leading the burial society and to conducting the local church choir.

When I returned, he was a healthy, hard-working man full of compassion, love and care for his family and our mother. Two years down the line I saw signs of deterioration but without any suspicion of him having HIV/Aids.

One afternoon when he returned from work he reported that he was not feeling well. At the time his second child was in hospital and her mother was looking after her.

The next day my brother was unable to report for work and stayed in bed the whole day. At about 8pm he called me and told me he wanted to go to the hospital.

Little did I know that this exchange of words was the last between us. I could not read from that encounter that I would never share a joke or play a game of cards with him again.

The ambulance arrived and he and our mother left for the hospital. Later that evening she returned, not looking happy. We slept that night without any news. At about 10am a call came from the hospital to inform us of the death of my brother.

I will never forget that day. I walked from home to the hospital on foot to see my brother. I could not believe what I heard. But he was dead.

Returning home took me hours, I cannot remember how long, wondering what I would say to his wife and kids.

He was buried four days later. It will seem like an exaggeration when I write that his funeral was the biggest I have attended. Some people asked if he was someone important in society. He was, in his own right.

A year and a half after his burial, his second child died.I did not know what precisely had killed my brother and his child, except that the doctors said it was pneumonia. Then a confidant of my brother disclosed that it was Aids that had killed him.

Our mother and I did not want to believe it and whoever dared to say HIV/Aids was not welcome in our home. I remember a close friend mentioned it and he was prevented from visiting my home.

Later I learned to accept that Aids was a member of all families in South Africa.

I went to test and tested negative.

However, my turning point came when I met Hazel Tau. She has opened my eyes to look at Aids differently. I am not infected but I am genuinely affected by HIV/Aids. Today, I see every life as a gift that has to be protected and appreciated.

Hazel has lived with HIV/Aids for 15 years. She complained to the Competition Commission to challenge drug companies to reduce prices [Tau was one of the complainants - along with the Treatment Action Campaign, Cosatu, Ceppwawu and the Aids Consortium - to win a battle with pharmaceutical giants for generic triple-drug therapy to be sold in South Africa].

She was married, divorced without her consent and she almost died. She has weighed 27kg and had a CD4 count of just nine. Sometimes with tears in her eyes, Hazel expresses her indebtedness to an anonymous sponsor who paid for antiretroviral drugs for her. Now she is 37 years old and her weight has increased to almost 76kg, her CD4 count to more than 650. She believes she has many more years to live.

Her skill in counselling has been acquired through her experience of living and working as an HIV/Aids activist, motivator, educator and adviser. At present she is working as a senior counsellor in the research unit of Method of Improving Reproductive Health in Africa.

Hazel and I met in Newtown, Johannesburg, and have been friends ever since. I can vividly remember when she told me who she was: she introduced herself to me through important books, including Judge Edwin Cameron's Witness to Aids. These books opened a new world for me and paved a way to a wonderful friendship. I started to read and engage in discussion on different issues around HIV/Aids.

Hazel knows that death is inevitable. Her knowing that truth, and the value of her life, finds her standing against the powers that be and death itself. She deserves to be seen as a woman of honour.

This beautiful woman is endowed with a gift of loving life. I know her to be full of respect and courage, and a champion of honesty, truth and values.

The purpose of writing this has been to pay tribute to Hazel Tau. I express my deepest gratitude for awakening the sleeper. I pay my respect to her unceasing commitment to denounce any form of unjust treatment and high-profile misrepresentation of medical facts on issues of HIV/Aids. And above all, I salute her determination to make a distinctive contribution to all people living with HIV/Aids.

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ST061003