Important note: Information in this article was accurate in 1994. The state of the art may have changed since the publication date.
San Francisco Chronicle (SF) - WEDNESDAY, December 14, 1994 Edition: FINAL Section: News Page: A18 Word Count: 432
Tara Shioya, Chronicle Staff Writer
Some nights, Jasmine lifts her baby daughter out of her bed and hugs her close. And then she cries herself to sleep, because she cannot believe what is happening to them.
Jasmine, not her real name, was told in 1991 that she has AIDS. She found out she was HIV-positive when her then-boyfriend, a drug user, accused her of giving the virus to him. Now 32, she has a 14-month-old daughter, Sierra, who is also HIV-positive.
Some mornings, the first thing Jasmine thinks about is having AIDS. Other mornings, it is not. But each day, she says, she tries to look for the "good parts" in life.
"It might be a really bad day," says Jasmine, who is highly prone to strep G and other infections. "But then Sierra will turn around and smile at me."
A Season of Sharing grant has helped Jasmine buy a used car, which she badly needs to drive herself and her daughter from their San Rafael home to their many medical appointments in San Francisco. The fund will also help pay a sizable telephone bill left by a former roommate, who abandoned Jasmine after finding out she has AIDS.
Over the past year, Jasmine has been hospitalized three times, suffering from a high fever, chills and intense night sweats. She must rely on Supplemental Security Income and Aid to Families With Dependent Children to pay her bills, because she is not well enough to work.
Sierra's father, a drug addict who is homeless, does not help with expenses. Jasmine says he is not fit to take care of Sierra, although he insists otherwise. She has recently had a restraining order issued against him for fear that he might try to physically harm her, as he has done before.
For the recovering alcoholic who says she once "wanted off the planet," motherhood has changed everything. The pain of Jasmine's past seems to disappear as she casts a loving glance at her energetic daughter playing on the floor. With a full head of feathery blond hair and bright blue eyes, Sierra looks perfectly healthy as she rifles through a cloth bag filled with toys.
Even though Sierra is well now, her mother watches her closely. And she is always aware that she must cherish the time she has with her daughter -- because she does not know just how much time they will have.
CAPTION: PHOTO The Season of Sharing fund is helping Jasmine, a single mother with AIDS, and her 14-month-old daughter, Sierra/BY MICHAEL MALONEY/THE CHRONICLE
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