Important note: Information in this article was accurate in 2009. The state of the art may have changed since the publication date.
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New Vision (Kampala) - September 20, 2009
Dear Doctor,
My wife and I went for an HIV test and I tested positive, while she tested negative. Our marriage is now on the rocks though in public we try to hide it because we are leaders in our church. What do we do? We are young, yet we now cannot have sex and our church does not allow divorce?
Joseph
Dear Joseph,
HIV discordance, where two people in a sexual relationship test differently for HIV, is fairly common in marriage where consensual sex is practised.
So, you must be congratulated on having decided to go together for the test because many people in discordant relationships do not know it.
Instead of writing off your marriage, go for couple counselling. An HIV/AIDS counsellor will guide you on how to continue with your marriage, including sexual union while you are discordant.
It is important that you get in the practice of consistently and correctly using condoms each time you have sex, since as you are still young, abstaining can strain your relationship.
Condoms, when used consistently and correctly, can significantly protect people from contacting HIV and other sexually transmitted infections.
You could also join a support group of other people who are living in discordant relationships for experience-sharing.
Most HIV/AIDS service organisations have such groups. Speak to your doctor or counsellor.
090920
NV090913
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