Miami Herald - July 10, 2004
Erika Pesantes, epesantes@herald.com

AIDS had ravaged the body of his 40-year-old mother. She barely remembered Seay and his siblings' hospital visits, even though they commuted daily by Metrorail to spend final moments by her bedside.

Then, one August morning at North Shore Medical Center, Dorothea Seay died quietly of a kidney infection.

Suddenly, at just 22, Antonio Seay assumed the role of father for his five younger siblings. He cast his social life aside to provide a stable home environment for his brothers and sisters. For now, he says he doesn't worry much about going out with friends and dating.

"He just came in and took an unexpected role," said Alvin Smith, Seay's friend and former Miami Edison High football coach.

"He's 100 percent on his own and he's running his household as a single father. I'm just impressed," he said.

The eldest of six, Seay put his plans for graduate school on hold as he took legal custody of his 15-year-old twin brothers Corrian and Torrian Seay and sister Keyera Brown, 14.

The twins' father gave up custody of his children and Keyera's father died in 2001. Two other sisters, Shronda, 16, and Princess Seay, 20, also live with their brother. Shronda still keeps in contact with her dad, who lives in Hallandale Beach.

Princess' daughter, Jerkaiya Carter, is also part of the close-knit household.

"I try to be a role model, a friend and a brother all at the same time," says Antonio Seay, as niece Jerkaiya locks her bright brown eyes on him.

Seay picks up and smooches the energetic toddler. He doesn't act like their father, he says.

But, like a parent, Seay, who is now 23, glows when praising his sister Shronda. He's proud of her high FCAT scores.

And Corrian wants to play for his school's football team, but his grades must improve before Seay allows him to join.

Seay was an athlete at Miami Edison High. He was on the football, basketball and track teams all while maintaining a 3.1 grade point average, which landed him a full college scholarship.

Seay -- or Mankie, as his siblings affectionately call him -- values education. And his siblings take note: "He's smart. He's good to be around," says Torrian Seay. "Everything he teaches me I keep in my head."

With a bachelor's degree in business administration from Jersey City's St. Peter's College, Seay became his family's first college graduate.

And he wants all his siblings to follow in the same path.

He eventually wants to enroll at a local university for law school or a master's in business administration. He would like to be a business fraud investigator, he says.

But, currently he is working as a youth career counselor at Jobs for Miami-- an affiliate of South Florida Workforce -- where he advises about 60 teens a month.

"I'm dealing with kids every day. You learn on both sides -- at home and on the job," he says.

With a salary of just under $30,000, Seay squeezes by with all of the expenses of running a family with Social Security benefits for the children and subsidized rent with the HUD program.

He even manages to deposit money monthly into each of his siblings' savings accounts.

"It's money they can set aside for college," says Seay.

Seay has also added structure in the home and curfews to follow. And Smith, who sometimes stops by to get his hair cut by Seay, says the teens' grades have been a total turnaround.

Family friend Valerie Person-Baker also stepped in shortly after the teens' mother died; she wanted to provide maternal warmth, she said.

"I was there, I observed the interaction between the brothers and sisters. They don't go somewhere without his permission," Person-Baker says.

"They respect him," she adds.

Household chores are also abundant and all assigned. The dishwashing, cooking and cleaning are all tended to according to a schedule on the refrigerator door. Each teen has tasks and can't do much to ignore them, Seay says. They take trips to the fridge often enough to notice, he jokes. "It's a learning process every day," says Seay. "It's not as hard; they're teenagers. They know right from wrong."

"I want them to be young, have fun and explore," he says. Seay has applied for a job as a police officer with the City of Miami police department, hoping to acquire some experience there for an eventual job as a fraud investigator. He's looking into Metro-Dade, the Broward Sheriff's Office and Miami-Dade Schools Police Department as well.

Seay dreams of having his own home with a pool, he says. In fact, he's on the lookout for one that he can share with his siblings.

"I'm being there for them. I'm guiding them to what God has planned for them in the near future."

"[My mother] had so much trust in me," he says. "She always kept a positive mind. Always confident everything will be all right. She always pushed us to go as far as you can. I just live by that."

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