Important note: Information in this article was accurate in 2004. The state of the art may have changed since the publication date.
Bangkok Post - July 11, 2004
Anjira Assavanonda
"Nobody sits with me in class today. It's never been like this before," said Kaew.
Her brother shares her pain. "The older students I used to play football with kept asking me what disease actually killed my father. At one time, they kicked me when I refused to answer. They turned away when I asked to join their team," he said.
It has been almost 10 years since their father's death, but the family is still haunted by the Aids stigma - an issue that the 15th International Aids Conference, which opened today in Bangkok, is trying to tackle.
The family's plight worsened when their story was aired on Thee Nee Prathet Thai (This is Thailand) TV programme about a month ago.
Kaew's mother, Noi, said neighbours had shunned the family since HIV/Aids took her husband's life in 1995, with only a few villagers daring to talk or get close to them.
It was difficult for her to get a job while her children were often shunned by others who lived in the neighbourhood.
"My kids were ejected when they went to buy snacks in the grocery shop. Sometimes when they played near the water tanks, neighbours told them to go away, fearing they would spread the virus in the drinking water," said Noi.
She said her husband tested HIV-positive when the couple came to Bangkok for a construction job. He did not tell Noi how he became infected with the virus and died six months after returning home to Phitsanulok, leaving the family behind. By that time, their third child was only one-year-old.
Noi's blood test showed she was HIV negative. The woman was confident neither she nor the three children have contracted the virus.
"It's almost 10 years now, and the children are 13, 11, and 10 years old. If we had been infected, we should have had some symptoms or even died. But we're in good health," said Noi. A retired district health officer has hired Noi to take care of his 13-rai orange orchard. Her job, which began three years ago, is to spray pesticides, and mow grass and weeds. She gets 100 baht a day for working from 8 am to 3.30 pm. The children also help her on weekends and get 50 baht each per day.
Noi said she knows pesticides are harmful, and often cause her illness, but she has no other choice. "What else can I do if I quit the job? How can we survive?" she asked.
When the TV crew filmed her life story, Noi hoped help would pour in for her family, and their lives would improve.
Someone in the audience donated 1,500 baht, and someone else gave a set of water pipes to give the family access to tap water. The children's schools also waived fees for lunch meals, textbooks and uniforms.
But the adverse impacts of the television show was beyond her expectations. Since the airing of the programme, her family story has become more public than ever.
"One day when I got on a bus with my daughter, a school parent pointed a finger at us and said to her child, 'See that girl? I remember her and her Mum on TV a few days ago. Her father died of HIV/Aids.' Why did she need to say that?" said Noi.
Kaew became isolated at school. Her teacher called a student meeting, encouraging them to treat the girl as they once did.
But little has changed.
Noi said Kaew has looked depressed ever since. Worse, her two sons, who had had no idea about the cause of their father's death, found out from the TV programme.
"I had never told my sons because they were too small. But after watching the programme, they knew but kept asking me if Aids actually killed their father. I just said 'yes', knowing it hurts, but that's the truth," said Noi.
She did not blame the TV programme though. "I knew they did it with good intentions, and things really got better with more public help. The only bad thing is everything is now public. But we can't deny the truth," she said.
Noi hoped time would one day heal their family wounds. She hoped her story would create sympathy and better understanding for HIV-infected people and their families.
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