Bay Windows - June 16, 2005
Ethan Jacobs, ejacobs@baywindows.com.

"I'm growing up not liking gay relationships," said Thomas.

The forum, sponsored by MOCAA (a program of the Multicultural AIDS Coalition, or MAC), the Latin American Health Institute, and AIDS Action's MALE Center (a drop in center for gay and bi men), was an intergenerational dialogue for men of color held as part of Unity Pride, a celebration of the black LGBT community held June 8-12. The dialogue, which focused primarily on sexuality and HIV, was one of a handful of Unity Pride events designed to address the issues facing black LGBT people in the Boston area.

On June 12 Union United Methodist Church in the South End held a gospel brunch to celebrate the LGBT community's inclusion in the church. One of the other events, a daylong forum June 9 on the issues facing black gay men called the "Brothers Igniting the Power Forum," was canceled the day of the event due to lack of attendance. Glenn Williams, event coordinator for Unity Pride, said the timing of that event, from 10 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. on a Thursday, was inconvenient for many people who had expressed interest in attending, so organizers tried to direct them to the intergenerational forum that evening.

The intergenerational dialogue revealed differences between the way youth and adults in the room viewed the gay male community. Williams, responding to the comments of Thomas and the other youth attendees, explained that when he came out as a young man in the late '60s, sexuality, including casual sex, was seen as empowering, not degrading.

"When I came out as a gay person in 1969... we were part of a sexual revolution," said Williams. "We had been discriminated against and oppressed, and this is something we considered our right."

Ben Perkins, director of the MALE Center, said that casual sex and promiscuity are just as much a part of the straight community as the gay community, but the language that people use to describe them in the gay world is charged with implicit homophobia.

"Straight people have lover's lanes. Gay people have cruising areas," said Perkins.

Yet Michaela Andrews, a 25-year-old Bostonian, said when he first came out the majority of social scenes he found, particularly the club scene, placed a heavy emphasis on promiscuity and casual sex. Andrews, who has attended the Boston Gay and Lesbian Adolescent Social Services (GLASS) Community Center for 10 years and plans to come back as a volunteer this fall, said he has worked to become a role model for the youth at GLASS give them the message that they can make their own choices about what kind of relationships they want to have.

"What I'm trying to do is help the young people," said Andrews. "There was no one telling me there's more to life than just the clubs and just the bars."

Williams suggested that the generational differences were tied into the AIDS epidemic, since many of the younger attendees were born too late to remember a gay community before AIDS.

"The big elephant that's in the room here is that HIV has made sex a potentially deadly activity," said Williams.

At the close of the event the attendees drafted a list of topics that they hoped to discuss at future dialogues, including homophobia, racism, and religion and spirituality, No events have yet been scheduled, but the organizers said they intend the dialogue to be the beginning of a larger conversation about the issues facing gay and bi men of color.

"It's my hope that not only is it a conversation but it's a starting point for things we can do in programming in the future," said Perkins.

If the intergenerational dialogue represented a beginning, the June 12 gospel brunch at Union United built on years of work bringing together the LGBT community and the black church. For the past five years Union United has participated in Unity Pride, and in 2000 the church voted to become reconciling and inclusive to the LGBT community, the first black Methodist church to do so. This year the church invited Lee James, MAC's director of programs targeting gay and bi men, to address the congregation at their Sunday service and hosted a brunch to mark Unity Pride in the church basement after the service.

In the current political climate, where the LGBT community has locked horns with many faith communities over same-sex marriage and other issues, the atmosphere at Union United was almost surreally gay friendly. Traditional nuclear families in their Sunday best and distinguished church ladies in their wide-brimmed hats gave their enthusiastic applause when James stepped up to the podium. James thanked the church's pastor, the Rev. Martin McLee, for going above and beyond in his efforts to welcome the LGBT community.

"It's about being loving. It's about being caring. It's about having a space where you feel safe to praise God," said James.

After the service at the brunch in the basement attendees said that level of acceptance in a black church is a rarity, and a welcome one at that.

"Culturally, black Christian churches don't usually welcome anything gay," said Aqilla Manna, a Dorchester resident (whose partner, incidentally, is James's mother). "For them to acknowledge and welcome [the LGBT community], it's totally unusual."

Regina Ford, another Dorchester resident, was not a member of the church, but she attended the service after seeing it on the calendar of Unity Pride events. She was so moved both by the service and by the inclusive community of the church that she joined the congregation on the spot.

"I feel comfortable in this church," said Ford, who said she had never been in a church that was as welcoming to the LGBT community.

Joan McFarlane, also from Dorchester, said that the gospel brunch was her first visit to Union United, but she expects she will be back.

"I was searching for a church, and I had been to others, and I didn't feel comfortable, but I felt comfortable today," said McFarlane.

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