Question:

Dear Doctor,
Ok...I am now totaly freaked out!!! I just got a call and a good friend of mine wanted to warn me about the "new dude" I've been hanging out with. He told me to make sure I talk to him about being totaly protected before we have sex because he used to have a lot of unprotected sex with a girl that had full blown AIDS...But its too late! I already had sex with him like 5 times, all very unprotected and he came inside me all 5 times!!! I am 21 and this guy is like 45, I'm so scared! He knew she had AIDS & didn't even tell me! Do you think he might have been tested already and he came up clean and that's why he didn't say anything? Can I still get it from him, even if he doesn't have symptoms?

Even if I did go get tested tomorrow, would it even show up? How long could it be until I may even know at all if I do have it or not?

Answer provided by:

Mark H. Katz, M.D.
Regional HIV/AIDS Physician Coordinator
Kaiser Permanente of Southern California

Your situation underscores the importance of practicing safe sex. You will be able to avoid such stressful situations as these in the future.

To answer your specific questions:
It would be foolhardy for me, or anyone, to speculate, on what goes on inside someone's mind, i.e. whether he knew he was negative, or whether he knew he was positive and simply took a risk.

Yes, someone can transmit the virus even if they do not have symptoms--that is probably how it happens most of the time. But the lower the viral load, the less likely this is to occur.

If someone becomes newly infected, it generally shows up on the antibody test within 2-4 weeks, and most likely within 2 months, and definitively within 3 months. Said another way, if it has been 3 months since your last contact with this person, and your test is negative, you do not have HIV.

Please get tested now, and again at 3 months, to insure your continued good health.

Also, a suggestion based on experience--you may choose to talk to the man you had sex with about his status, or not...But please remember, it is your own test which will be the truth-telling one, not his statement.

Good luck!
Mark Katz, MD

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